Every parent is aware of the importance of their kid’s academic success. Not only does it open up many opportunities for a future career, but it also does wonders to the kid’s self-confidence. Some kids are too young to understand the value of education, while others may be old enough, but have never had it pointed out. Luckily, many kids have parents who are taking an active role in their education and that almost always bears fruit.
Parents need to recognise what kind of conditions are best for their kids and strive to create them. One of the crucial elements is definitely motivation. The effort that results from motivation is nowhere near as difficult as the one that comes as a consequence of punishment or fear of failure. So, what is it that our kids respond to best and how to create such an environment?
If you want to influence your kid, you need to create a respectful and open relationship with them. They need to know you’re there for them and that you will react out of understanding and love, rather than frustration and anxiety, though such feelings will be inevitably present. Still, you have to recognise that they are nothing but your reaction to the situation and not some feelings your kid wanted you to be overwhelmed with. Also, you want your kid to be responsible and independent and not react to you and your emotions.
Recognise their effort and achievement
Kids need to understand that in order to get a reward they have to do something right and the more good things they do, the more rewards they’ll reap, hopefully. That’s why you should always point out their progress, which comes as a result of practice. Next, let them know there is a prize for a job well done, such as an evening with a friend, a movie night with their family or similar small treat. That will motivate them to finish the task ahead, no matter how young they are, because they’ll understand there is some enjoyment to be had after work.
Provide the right kind of help
Help comes in different shapes and sizes, but is always more than welcome. Your kid needs to be aware that you’ll do your best to help them with any problem they have. Sometimes they’ll just want to talk to you, while sometimes they might ask for help with learning. If the latter is the case and you can’t provide the assistance they need, exploit the efficient online tutoring option and find a tutor who can provide the help your kid requires.
Encourage them to share
Asking your kid about their day at school is alright, but it doesn’t go really far in showing you’re interested. Instead, ask them to tell you what they’ve learned or how they’ve dealt with a problem at school. That will lend weight to their effort and achievements and they will immediately feel better. Self-confidence is vital in reaching goals, because, without it, there will be no success. If your kid doesn’t believe they can do something, they won’t even bother to try, since they don’t want to experience failure.
Don’t make them fear failure
If your kid is motivated solely by the fear of failure, they won’t get very far in life. Instead, teach them that failures are normal and that they happen to everyone. Point out that the most important thing is what we learn from them and how we react to them. Avoid punishing them for failing to get the grade they wanted, but focus on finding out the root of the problem and why they didn’t succeed. If you see they can identify the mistake and put more effort into correcting it the next time, you’ve helped them learn a very valuable lesson.
Having a kid who is independent, responsible and confident is every parent’s dream. However, it will remain a dream unless we, parents, do something to turn it into reality. So, incorporate these tips into your approach and you’ll notice many improvements in your kid’s attitude towards school and life in general.